How To Deal With Stubborn People? – 8 Strategies That Really Work

Jake TylerBy Jake TylerSep 19, 20160
how to deal with stubborn people

The Cambridge Dictionary defines a stubborn person as someone who is determined to do what he or she wants and just refuses to do anything else. Having to deal with stubborn people can be frustrating and even annoying at times. However, if you take them as a challenge and consider dealing with them as a test of your patience, you can do much better. They can be a source of improving your mental strength besides letting you know how strong you actually are.

Whether it is a stubborn boss, a colleague, a family member or friend, stop hoping that they’ll change on their own, because stubborn is what they are. The only thing that can change is your attitude. In this article, you will go through some of the most effective strategies on how to deal with stubborn people and reduce your stress.


Start By Changing Yourself

Start by Changing Yourself

Consider it as a challenge, and a chance for you to prove to yourself how emotionally strong you are. You need to understand that every person can't behave the way you would like them to be. So the same attitude isn’t going to work for everyone. Start by changing yourself. Only then you can expect their attitude towards you to change.


No Arguments

No Arguments

Getting into an argument with stubborn people is the worst thing you can do to yourself. The chances are that it will end up in frustration. It would further worsen the things between the both of you. Instead, control your strong urge to argue with them in an attempt to prove your point. Silence can sometimes be more efficient. If you find it difficult to keep quiet, slip away from that place by giving an excuse instead of sitting in agony or getting into a heated discussion that ends up in nothing.



Choose Your Words Carefully

Choose Your Words Carefully

Sometimes, it's unavoidable to present your opinion, and you can’t just avoid it by staying silent or slipping away. When you have to present your opinion, do it with respect and choose your words carefully so as not to take the discussion towards heated arguments. Instead, you can get your desire outcome by giving respect to their opinion (even if you disagree) and then humbly present your view.



Choose The Perfect Moment

Choosing the Perfect Moment

Even a typically flexible person who isn’t stubborn most of the times may not listen with an open mind when he isn’t in the best of his moods. It's crucial to choose the right time to present your case with a stubborn person. With every type of person, there are times when they are in a mood to listen. Your job is to strike at the right moment when they are calm and not in a hurry or bad mood.


How Patient You Need To Be?

How Patient You Need to Be

A stubborn person is a challenge for those who deal with him. It takes patience, and you must keep in mind that people don’t change overnight. Patience yields the best results. Be consistent and don’t lose your mind. Let the time do its job.



Let Them Digest It

Let them Digest It

One of the practical strategies to help your opinion get through to a stubborn person is by dividing it into small ‘doses’ and giving it one at a time. It can sometimes be more efficient than forcing your opinion all at once. Though it can be time-consuming and needs some hard work, in the end, it would be worth it.


Getting To The Bottom

Getting to the Bottom

Even stubborn people do have some reasons to be stubborn! Psych Mechanics acknowledges that most human behaviors are either reward seeking or pain avoiding. Similarly, stubbornness is a behavior with a reason.

Try to get to the bottom of their stubbornness and it would become much easier to cope with it. Sometimes, it is because a stubborn person doesn’t like to hear that he or she is wrong. If this is the case, you should always appreciate their point of view before giving yours. You should let them know that you respect their opinion but how about another ‘less smart’ one.

For some others, the reason of stubbornness might be because they like to be the boss. Make them feel like one. Tell them how intelligent they are and then put forward your modest proposal not as an equally right opinion but as another important plan.


Explain How Your Opnion Benefits Them

Explain How Your Opinion Benefits Them

Many times, people stick to their viewpoints because they see the benefits that they can reap from those points of view. That’s entirely rational. If you want to get your viewpoint through to them, you would have to come up with a list of benefits that your perspective can offer. Forbes suggests that people will find it easy to change their behavior if they think that the new practice is natural, normal, and rewarding.

To put it in simple words, as they realize that your opinion can be more beneficial, they would certainly give it a thought. It may even include ‘bribing’ them with some alluring benefits. For instance, if you are tired and don't feel like going out for a dinner, you may bribe your wife by saying, “how about saving the money we will spend on dinner tonight for that upcoming sale of your favorite party wear brand.”

In Conclusion

No matter how demanding it might get to deal with a stubborn person, the reward at the end is worth it - a stronger you. It's a path that leads to your development. So it is worth all the hard work. Just don't give up and be consistent. All it needs is the right technique at the right time for the right purpose.

If this article is helpful in dealing with a stubborn person in your life, I would love to hear from you. Your experience can be a source of motivation for others. So, do share it in the comments.

Jake Tyler

Jake Tyler

Hi all, I’m Jake Tyler, over the past decade I’ve been working strong on my personal fitness levels. From the age of 16, I have been a kickboxer, and I’ve built up an incredible passion for fitness & self-improvement. This experience has led me to a career in personal training and health & fitness.
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